I'm baaack....

Wow, it's been a long time since I've posted on here and my whole life is so different now than it was almost five years ago.

First of, I managed to lose a bunch of weight and am down to about 152, eight pounds less than my goal weight of 160.  I look pretty good, if I do say so myself.

I also got divorced in May of this year.  Kenin and I had a lot of good years but we also had a number of not great years so we separated in April, 2017.  Please don't shed any tears...  I didn't.  I'm very happy being on my own and have been enjoying the single life.

I've been dating a lot and have decided that I don't know that I'll ever be monogamous again.  I believe in love, but not necessarily that I'll find it again.  I don't mean that in a bad way, either.  On the plus side, I've been seeing someone for almost year now and I waffle back and forth between trying to decide if it's love (or could be at some point) but as of right now, it's just whatever it is.

I was fired from Dish earlier this year, but that was definitely a blessing in disguise because I never knew how miserable I was there until I left.  The said that I was termed due to poor performance but it was awfully suspicious when they didn't even tell my manager they were firing me and waited until a day he was off to do the deed.  I felt pretty vindicated when they appealed my unemployment and they lost.  It was particularly gratifying to hear my old manager say that when I was fired that I was meeting expectations.

Ashlyn and boyfriend are now Ashlyn and husband, which is pretty awesome.  It's been almost 9 years for them and while they haven't given me a grandchild yet, I do have a granddog, which is pretty cool.  But make no mistake, I'm still holding out for a human.

Jena is in the process of getting divorced and in addition to my three amazing grandsons, she's finally giving me a GRANDDAUGHTER in December.  All I have to say is that it's about damn time.

Patrick is living in Texas with his bio mom and is doing really well from what I hear.

Hunter has his own place here in Denver and is struggling with addiction, so please send him some good thoughts, light and love, especially since we just found out some life changing news.

Now that I'm back into this, I imagine it's going to go more in the direction of kind of a diary, so folks, it's no holds barred.  I didn't really hold back before, but now I'm REALLY not going to hold back.

OMG

The other day, we had to purchase some medicine for Kenin.  It's an injectable medicine that he needs to - literally - help him stay alive.  It's called Fragmin and is necessary for keeping Kenin's blood thin enough to break up the blood clot he got (and still has) in his leg after hip replacement surgery last July.  After he had surgery, it cost $200 for 2 tiny little vials.  The other day when we bought it, the cost was $633 (after the insurance knocked off $80) for a single vial.  OMG.  What the hell? 

Yes, we have insurance, and now, we're over halfway to the deductible.  But, OMG....  $633 for a drug that could save your life.  It's a small price to play when you think of it in those terms, but OMG....  $633.  I did not imagine we'd have to pay that much.  I freaked out over the $200 but that was nothing compared to this.  That's half my rent.  That's more than both my car payments each month.  That's pretty much my food budget for the month.  $633 is a lot of money. 

Like I said, it's worth it, but come on, that's just the drug makers getting rich.  The folks who have the hardest time working - and often are not able to work - are the ones that have to pay for expensive drugs like this.  This is just ridiculous.

just how far will i go to be healthy?

I've quit smoking (again).  Today makes 1 month.  Thirty whole days, as of noon today, since I had a cigarette.  It hasn't been too awful hard, but that's because of a wonder drug called Wellbutrin.  I've had great success with it when I quit before (now, how horrible does that sound?  "I had success quitting smoking in the past."  OMG, obviously it wasn't a permanent thing or else I wouldn't have had to quit AGAIN.) and it's working good for me now, too.  I quit because I was getting that hacking smoker's cough, which was unpleasant.  And it's not like I didn't know that it's bad for me.  After all, I've been hearing from my father for the last 25 years about how bad it was.  Well, Pops, you can quit bitching now.

The other thing that's going on now is that Kenin got turned onto vitamins by Andrew Lessman by a co-worker.  He only sells them on the Home Shopping Network and if you've got a problem or even might have a problem in the future, he's got a fix for it.  Kenin was taking the bone and joint ones and his friend suggested that I might benefit from the women's health vitamins.  Well, let me tell you what, it didn't take a whole lot of convincing on the part of the friend, because Kenin's already absolutely positive that my hormones are just raging out of control, like the blood thirsty newborn vampires in one of those Twilight movies.  According to him, there are certain times when I no longer even have bats residing in my belfry because there's just too much crazy up in there for them to have room to fly.  Apparently they've gone and done what any reasonable bat would do - they got they hell out of Dodge.  So to appease my husband, I started taking them.  Five damn horse pills at a time, I take those stupid vitamins.  I've been taking them for over a month and the only thing I've noticed is that they turn my pee Chernobyl yellow.  It GLOWS, it's so yellow.  I don't think they're doing anything for me, but if it makes my husband feel better, I'll take 'em.

get your own

Hunter, proudly displaying his new Michigan State t-shirt he received from his grandfather:  Isn't it awesome?  I love it!  Thank you, Pawpaw!

Kenin:  Hey, Hunter, that IS an awesome shirt.  Are you going to let me wear it?

Hunter:  No.  Get your OWN grandpa!

do I suck or what?

Yes, yes, yes, I know it's been forever since I've updated, and I know you 3 homeless guys who hang at the library are pretty mad, but, hey, I'm lazy. You ought to know that by now; it's not like it's a big secret or anything.

Ah, but look what I've been up to...

Me and Patrick

Kenin and Waverly

Hunter (aka Uncle Peanut) and Paul

Kenin, Hunter and Paul

Waverly and Paul

Patrick, Paul and Kenin

Paul and Jena

Jena and Paul

Paul (Isn't he cute? He gets it from me. LOL)

Jena, Paul and Hunter

Sean

from the peanut gallery...

Kenin: Yeah, I stopped by the grocery store today and got some chicken gizzards for lunch.

Hunter: Uh, Dad? Um, isn't that chicken groin?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What's the scariest thing I've heard lately?

After seeing the trailer for the upcoming Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus movie, the following words were uttered by my dear husband (who I'm positive was at the time possessed by no less than Lucifer himself):

"That movie looks pretty cute."

a boy and his dad

the lesson I learned this weekend

I'd like to think that I'm a pretty decent person, certainly not someone you'd see on Cops or anything like that. But there are times when someone will piss me off and I just want to get 3 shades of redneck. However, I'm usually pretty good at controlling my temper because on the (thankfully) very rare occasion that I loose it, unpleasant things are bound to occur.

Don't you just hate it when someone eggs you on? You can see it coming from a mile away, that it's going to end and not only will it end, but it will end badly and with a fair amount of carnage, none of which will be you because you are the one carrying a big stick and an extra large can of whup ass. Well, I just plain hate it when someone can't let something go. And I particularly hate it when that someone is my normally wonderful husband and he's just doing his level best to make me mad.

So, if you're like me and someone's aggravating you sure as they're breathing and you've told them 3 times that this is a conversation better not conversed right now and they still push you, here's what not to do:

DO NOT THROW your very favorite $65 heavy metal stock pot toward the sink (throwing it at your spouse is probably not such a great idea either, but hopefully you know this already). If you do throw the pot, it will bounce off the rim of the sink and head toward the wall. And when it gets to the wall, it will then leave a hole the size of your palm in the wall, and that's going to be a real bitch to repair. And just imagine the mess if that pot's not empty when you throw it.

The moral of this story? Don't throw your favorite stock pot. It'll dent and then you'll have to buy a new one. And that sucks.

are you pimped out?

Kenin: Hey Hunter, do you see what I'm wearing? My new carpenter jeans?

Hunter: Cool! Now my dad's all pimped out!

(I'm not real sure Hunter has discovered this yet, but he's actually a white boy who lives in the 'burbs.)

They Can Hear You, Too

Kenin: You know, some days you're my favorite least psychotic wife, and other days you're just my favorite psychotic wife.

Me: Now aren't you going to feel bad if I'm ever diagnosed with some sort of psychotic disorder?

Kenin: No. I'm actually expecting it.

Me: The voices in my head say they're disappointed in you.

This is a Compliment?

Kenin: "Honey, you're my least psychotic wife."

The Worshiping Has Begun

There are two things that my husband will wrestle the remote from you for, and those are college football games - preferably live - and anything even remotely related to the TV show Deadliest Catch, or as I call it, The Arthritic Adventures of Bait Boy*. About a month ago, Kenin WROTE ON OUR REFRIGERATOR CALENDAR that season 3 of Bait Boy would begin on April 3, and has pontificated every day since about just how much he adores this show. (And yes, I'm using the word 'adores', because 'likes' wouldn't even begin to address the amount of emotion Kenin has towards it.)

So, yesterday, hubby came home from work, grabbed the remote and began looking for episodes of the first two seasons of the show because usually there is marathon upon marathon of this show prior to a new season actually beginning. Upon discovering that the only marathon to be had was Dirty Jobs, he pouted loudly and once again asked/pleaded/offered up 7 virgins as a sacrifice/begged that I buy him the earlier seasons on DVD for his upcoming birthday, and could I please have them delivered immediately, if not sooner, because his world would collapse if he didn't have some Bait Boy to hold him off for the next 3 days.

People, as far as Kenin is concerned, this show is like porn, only a million times better.

So tonight, as Kenin surfed the TV Guide, God looked down on him and said, "Let there be The Deadliest Catch." And sure enough, there it was! I think he wet himself when he saw the recaps were on, but I'm not sure if it's because he lost bladder control or the ability to swallow his drool. He made sounds that scared small children and farm animals as he attempted to express his happiness. I, too, almost wet myself, but it was because I was laughing so hard at the man I adore way too much.

*I love my husband, but he has this delusional idea that he'll be heading to Alaska next winter for the crab season and he'll end up working on one of those damn boats. The position that the newbie on the boat gets is that of bait boy, and if I've told him once, I've told him a hundred times that he's too damn arthritic to even do that job. But because I love him so much, I just humor him and tell him, yes, darlin', they'll hire you in a New York minute. In fact, they'll practically beg you to work for them. But first they'll change the name of the show to reflect your importance to them. It'll now be known as The Arthritic Adventures of Bait Boy. And you'll be the star.

And To Accomplish That Goal...

Ashlyn was filling out a job application that asked that she tell a little more about herself. After deciding what she wanted to say, she spoke aloud as she wrote, "My long term goal is to attend culinary school or work with children." Kenin, in the background, was heard to say, "And to accomplish that goal, I plan on working as a cook in an elementary school." I think she may have been a little offended by that comment, but I was laughing too hard to be sure.

The Christmas Eve Tradition

Hunter: Mom, it's the day before Christmas!

Me: Yeah, that makes it Christmas Eve.

Hunter: So, uh, our tradition... we get to open a present early, right?

Me: Yeah, tonight. At Mamu and PaPa's house.

Hunter (totally whining): Why not now?

Me: Because Dad's not home.

Hunter: Why did he go to work anyway? He should be at home.

Me: Well, Hunter, he didn't want to go, but he didn't really have a choice.

Hunter: He should've told Bossman that it's Christmas and he needs to spend time at home with his family so his son can open up a Christmas present early!

Because I'm So Intelligent

During the Delaware-Appalachian State football game...

Me: Delaware's getting spanked.

Kenin: I know.

About 90 seconds later, Appalachian State scores another touchdown, making the score 21-0 with 10 minutes to go in the 2nd quarter.

Kenin: Baby, Appalachian State is spanking Delaware.

Me: Didn't I just say that?

Kenin: Yeah. I'm just reiterating what you said because you're so intelligent.

Well, duh.

Kenin's Surgery Update

Just a quickie to let everyone who cares - yep, all 3 of you - that it doesn't appear that Kenin's going to have to have another hip surgery, at least for now. He's walking with crutches for another few weeks, but if everything continues as it is now, he's got 10-15 years before he'll have to go back under the knife. Yee Haw!! :)

Merry Christmas to Me

This afternoon was Kenin's company Christmas party and although I was half hoping that the snow we got overnight would be bad enough that we were unable to attend, it didn't work out that way.

If you've read my blog, you know that I'm not his bosses' biggest fan, so for me, the bright spot in having to attend was that I might be able to say some of the things that I've had on my mind. That didn't quite work out the way I wanted either, because Kenin let me know before we left home that I was not allowed to tell Mr. Bossman that he was just damn lucky that Kenin was still working there after he decided to rescind his contribution (aka paycheck) to my bank account while Kenin was recovering after his recent surgery. After all, even though he told Kenin that he'd be paid while he was out of work, recovering from HIP SURGERY, he decided that would just not be something he was willing to do. It apparently wasn't enough that he screwed Kenin out of a commission check without telling him, two days before we were to go to Jena's wedding. But, me being me, all hope was not lost. I've gotten pretty good over the years at telling people to eat shit without them realizing it. It may not make them feel bad, but it sure makes me feel better. And that is all that counts, no?

So, at the party, Bossman #2 comes over to talk to us and somehow the conversation works its way around to work. Shocking, huh? Well, he mentions that they are considering planning a trip to the Left Coast to visit some vendors and I put my 2 cents in and mention that it's a good thing that Kenin isn't a big fan of California, since he won't be going. Let's face it, no commission also means no more sales calls. Good for me, bad for them. According to Kenin, Bossman #2 caught the dig. :) Then, later, Bossman #1 says to me how hard Kenin is working and I told him that I thought he was working way too hard, especially since he hadn't been released by his doctor to work more than 4 hours a day. Oops! LOL Kenin tried to recover from that one, but I'm glad Bossman #1 knows that he's working twice what his doctor wants him too, and I hope the weinie feels guilty as hell, too, 'cause I'm bitchy like that.

All in all, I'd have to say it was a productive day.

Saturday Night Dinner Theatre

The Setting: Red Lobster, during their Endless Shrimp promotion (irrelevant, but yummy)

The Actors: Hunter, as the Narrator; Kenin, Patrick, and me, as the Audience

The Props: A small, black plastic skeleton and a small neon green spider, given to Hunter by a waiter who is very nice to young boys in an almost-but-not-quite-full-blown creepy kind of way, and the small, red, lobster-topped, sword-shaped fruity drink holder thing that came in Hunter's Shirley Temple

Hunter: Aaarrgghh! The spider bit me on the hip (holds spider to skeleton's hip)! Here, let me thrust the sword into the spider (thrusts sword into the spider (duh))! Aw, crap! I hit my hip! Oh, my hip, my hip! Now I can't walk (makes dying sounds, much to the dismay of Kenin, who's apparently taken Hunter's playing just a little bit too seriously)! Aaarrrggghh!

The Audience (okay, it was only me): Hysterical laughter

Things That Make You Go Hmmmm

Okay, it's really only one thing, at least for now.

Every morning about 10 am, I inject my husband with a drug called Lovenox, which he has to take for about 10 days so that he doesn't develop blood clots after his recent hip surgery. This morning I noticed, according to the box, that Lovenox is "derived from porcine intestinal mucosa."

I am shooting my husband up with mucus from a pig's stomach. And I can't decide if I should be repulsed or just plain fascinated.

One More Thing Done And Over With

Last Tuesday Kenin finally had his hip resurfacing operation. It's been a long time coming, but we're so glad it's finally done. He came home from the hospital on Friday and although he's yet to make it upstairs (except to take a shower), he's doing pretty good. He can only be on his feet for about 10 minutes without being in major pain, but from what we understand, that's pretty much par for the course. Tomorrow he'll have a physical therapist come to the house and will start what I think will be - or at least feel like - some pretty intense therapy. Last week Kenin's boss said that he'd stop by and pick Kenin up and take him to work tomorrow, but if he's not really well enough to leave the house for therapy, then he damn sure won't be going to work, will he? Even if he shows up, he'll have to go through me and I outweigh the man by a good 30 pounds (being fat has it's advantage every now and then) so I'm not too worried.

Ashlyn went to Georgia on Saturday to spend a couple of weeks with her Dad and when I spoke with her today she was a bit shocked to learn that even though we had 70 degree weather yesterday, we had 6 inches of snow today. I told her we missed her, if for no other reason than we needed someone to shovel the snow.

Speaking of snow, our 3 legged cat, Angelo, meowed like hell to go outside this afternoon after the snow stopped. I finally let him out just to teach him a lesson. He bounded through the door with great abandon. The great abandon stopped though, about 2 feet from the door, when he quickly realized a couple of things: 1) My big fat belly is dragging through this cold, wet, white stuff and 2) This stuff is cold and wet. He immediately wanted to come back inside, so Angelo's Adventure in the Snow lasted all of about 45 seconds.