if only i could...

I'd like to do this to my 16 year old son, a good 75% of the people I have to speak with on the phone at work, and 2 agents I am currently supervising and training. 

just a quick, little vent

To the agents I currently supervise:

If I tell you not to hang up with your customer until you have finished making changes on their account, I'm saying it for a reason.  Mostly, because it's a bad idea.  When you have to call your customer back and ask more questions, get more info from them or explain that you gave incorrect information to them, you look like a bonehead.  And you make the company look bad.  Don't freaking do it.

And to everyone else in the world:

If you are wearing black pants and black shoes, please do not wear white socks.  I should not even have to say that, but obviously, I do.

let it snow, let it snow

So, it's been snowing since at least 4:30 this morning, when I took Bella out to go potty.  The TV stations are calling it a blizzard.  I don't know if that's true or not, but it's definitely coming down pretty good and the winds are nasty.  So far we probably have 8 or so inches and I'm keeping my fingers crossed (in vain, I'm sure) that I won't have to work tomorrow.  It's supposed to snow clear until 7 am.  Hunter probably won't have school, but it takes way more than a mere blizzard for my employer to be closed.  I doubt even an act of Congress would slow things down for us.  Basically, the rule is that if public transportation is still running, we're still open.  The  weather may be worse that what was expected though, because for only the third (count 'em, three!) time since the 2006-2007 snow season, the city of Denver is deploying residential plows.  So you know it isn't a fine spring day out there...

working for a living

So, there came a time a couple of years ago when the world was falling down around us, that I had to get a job.  Not a big deal.  I'm more than happy to help out.  Unfortunately, I was desperate.  No income, hubby on medical leave.  I won't lie - it was scary.  So I jumped on the first thing that came my way.  I went to work for "the worst company to work for in America". 

I won't actually mention the name, because if you were smart enough to find this blog, you're certainly smart enough to Google who the worst company to work for in America is. 

I'm not gonna lie... there were days, especially during the 7 month period when it was mandatory that I work 6 days a week, that I really agreed with that moniker.  Not so much now though.  Two days off a week can go a long way toward changing your attitude.

What I find really interesting sad is, how many people in this world want something for nothing.  I have a feeling that as I come across these folks, you're gonna hear about them.  Not like name and address stuff, but some of the crap that people say so they can get free TV.  And it very well may make your head spin around like Linda Blair's did in The Exorcist.

finally...

I'm working on redesigning my website, which I've been wanting to do since LAST summer.  But between work and kids and The Spouse, it just never happened.  Life got in the way, as it usually does. But now I'm not working (unless I want to, and then, only when it's convenient for me - I'm SO DONE with the 9 to 5 grind) and Hunter's in school, so now it's ME time and I promise myself, right here in front of the internet, God, and the 3 homeless people at the library that I will get the site redone! 

I laughed so hard I almost wet myself

I meant to post this last year, but you know how distracted I can... ooh, I see something shiney...  ;)

From CNN.com:

A recent college graduate is suing her alma mater for $72,000 -- the full cost of her tuition and then some -- because she cannot find a job.

In her complaint, Thompson says she seeks $70,000 in reimbursement for her tuition and $2,000 to compensate for the stress of her three-month job search.

As Thompson sees it, any reasonable employer would pounce on an applicant with her academic credentials, which include a 2.7 grade-point average and a solid attendance record.

I don't know what planet this girl's from, but it ain't this one.

what not to do when applying for a teaching job

The other day one of my students needed to take a break from work so we headed up to the office to do some shredding. My kiddo shreds a variety of things such as old tests or memos or whatever needs to be done away with and it just so happened that on this occasion, it was resume shredding time. The following is a list of things I noticed that you should not do:

1. I don't care if you are an elementary teacher or not, don't send your letter of interest and resume in on kiddie-themed paper. You may love kids, but you're still an adult, so present yourself that way.

2. Don't misspell the name of the school or the name of the person you're sending your resume to. Attention to detail? I think not.

3. Don't use incorrect grammar and punctuation. After all, you're supposed to be teaching kids, not needing to be taught.

4. Don't include a photo (no matter how cute it is) of you, your family and your dog on your letter of interest. No offense, but no one cares. And if your family is so important that you need to share them with a potential employer, then you may want to consider being a stay at home parent.

5. Don't continue to apply for positions at a place where they obviously don't want you. If you've been thank-you-but-no-thank-you'd the past 5 times you've applied, save yourself the embarrassment (I can promise you the folks in the office - and those of us shredding your resume again - are wondering if you'll ever get a clue) of being turned down. Again.

Good luck in your search for employment.

bless her heart

Teacher: This is the book we're going to read this week. It's called The Littles Go On A Hike.

Boy: It's a fiction book.

Teacher: Yes, it is a fiction book. Can you tell me why it's fiction?

Girl: Because they don't really go on a hike.

I swear this actually happened. I know it did because I heard it with my own ears. And then I walked out of the room and giggled for a full 2 minutes.

I'll stay right where I am, thanks

The other night Hunter and I were talking about the differences between co-workers and bosses.

Me: So, Ms. Special Ed Teacher is technically my supervisor, but she's also my co-worker because we work very closely. I'm not on the same level as Mr. Vice Principal or Mrs. Principal.

Hunter: No, you're not. First you'd have to be a real teacher. Then you've have to get your Master's Degree. And then, you'd have to get a degree in politics if you wanted to be a principal.

If he only knew how true that really is...

back to business

The last couple of weeks have been pretty busy for me, as work and school have both started up. I think I'll do okay in my classes (Interpersonal Communications and Intro to Reimbursement) if I can ever manage to find the time to work on them. Work is still the same in that I still think I'm smarter than my boss, so I can just see that it's going to be a banner year for me. Oh well, at least it pays the health insurance premium.

Since returning to work I've come to the conclusion that there are only 2 types of jobs that will really suit me. The first one is a job where I'm in charge of everything and I can tell people what to do. The other type of job is one where I'm left alone and don't have to deal with other people and their idiosyncrasies/idiocy. There really is no middle ground where I can be truly happy. Either let me fix everything, or leave me the hell out of it altogether!

Good news on the home front - we finally got new carpet. It has that stinky new carpet smell, but at least it looks decent and now I won't be ashamed to invite people over.

I swear I'll write more later, but I'm off to do whatever it is that I do. Caio!

Whose Fault Is It?

As an educator, it's my job, and most days my pleasure, to educate children. It's my job to raise children to be a responsible, productive member of society. Part of that responsibility is teaching a child - particularly one with special needs - to behave as much as possible within societal norms.

This means that when your child locks himself in the bathroom 2 minutes before the dismissal bell rings and refuses to come out until he's told that he's missed the bus and we're calling Daddy to pick him up, you need to understand that I'm not calling you just so I can piss you off. Your child needs for us to work together to provide consistent guidelines so that he knows what is okay and what is not okay. The fact that when he apologized to you (he was obviously terrified of you, but that's a whole 'nother story), you told him, "Don't worry. It's not your fault," pretty much amazed me. I'm sorry I have to shock you into reality but, yes, it was his fault. Despite the fact that your child's sister said that he does that and worse at home doesn't make it okay for him to do it at school. If he learns that it's 'not his fault', whose fault will it be when he locks himself in a bathroom (without stalls) at the mall or at a restaurant or when you're on vacation and in a hotel room?

Drunk With Power

Since yesterday was Take Your Child To Work Day, I took my child to work. It wasn't a huge change for Hunter, especially since I work at his school, but I think it turned out okay.

The morning was spent working with my kiddos, which was a wee bit less exciting than Hunter thought it would be, so when his class went out for recess, I shooed him out the door as well. But then came lunch time for the first graders...

During this time, my actual 'duty' is to keep an eye on Gap Baby (so named because if it doesn't come from The Gap, then it doesn't get worn) and to make sure that he stays seated, eats, etc., but he's a great little kid and doesn't need much more than just being aware of him and what he's doing. Naturally, this leaves me available to help out or be attacked by the other first graders who don't yet have the common sense to realize that it's easier to eat mac and cheese with a spork (spoon + fork = spork) than with your fingers, or who've made it their goal for the year to talk so loudly that I become permanently deaf. And this is where Hunter stepped in...

While giving the kids yet another lecture/verbal beating about the fact that they're just too damn loud(!), Hunter popped in with his 2 cents, so I had no choice but to introduce him to them. I don't know if it was because he was a 'big' kid or what, but they were enthralled by him. He took over (much like his mother has been known to do) and became a man on a mission. If there was a hand up, he made a bee line to it. If they had to potty, he gave them permission. If they wanted ketchup for their salad, he made sure they had it. He was absolutely drunk with the power that he had over these kids. And I think it's quite possible that he found his calling in supervising lunch for first graders.

And To Accomplish That Goal...

Ashlyn was filling out a job application that asked that she tell a little more about herself. After deciding what she wanted to say, she spoke aloud as she wrote, "My long term goal is to attend culinary school or work with children." Kenin, in the background, was heard to say, "And to accomplish that goal, I plan on working as a cook in an elementary school." I think she may have been a little offended by that comment, but I was laughing too hard to be sure.

The Christmas Eve Tradition

Hunter: Mom, it's the day before Christmas!

Me: Yeah, that makes it Christmas Eve.

Hunter: So, uh, our tradition... we get to open a present early, right?

Me: Yeah, tonight. At Mamu and PaPa's house.

Hunter (totally whining): Why not now?

Me: Because Dad's not home.

Hunter: Why did he go to work anyway? He should be at home.

Me: Well, Hunter, he didn't want to go, but he didn't really have a choice.

Hunter: He should've told Bossman that it's Christmas and he needs to spend time at home with his family so his son can open up a Christmas present early!

Merry Christmas to Me

This afternoon was Kenin's company Christmas party and although I was half hoping that the snow we got overnight would be bad enough that we were unable to attend, it didn't work out that way.

If you've read my blog, you know that I'm not his bosses' biggest fan, so for me, the bright spot in having to attend was that I might be able to say some of the things that I've had on my mind. That didn't quite work out the way I wanted either, because Kenin let me know before we left home that I was not allowed to tell Mr. Bossman that he was just damn lucky that Kenin was still working there after he decided to rescind his contribution (aka paycheck) to my bank account while Kenin was recovering after his recent surgery. After all, even though he told Kenin that he'd be paid while he was out of work, recovering from HIP SURGERY, he decided that would just not be something he was willing to do. It apparently wasn't enough that he screwed Kenin out of a commission check without telling him, two days before we were to go to Jena's wedding. But, me being me, all hope was not lost. I've gotten pretty good over the years at telling people to eat shit without them realizing it. It may not make them feel bad, but it sure makes me feel better. And that is all that counts, no?

So, at the party, Bossman #2 comes over to talk to us and somehow the conversation works its way around to work. Shocking, huh? Well, he mentions that they are considering planning a trip to the Left Coast to visit some vendors and I put my 2 cents in and mention that it's a good thing that Kenin isn't a big fan of California, since he won't be going. Let's face it, no commission also means no more sales calls. Good for me, bad for them. According to Kenin, Bossman #2 caught the dig. :) Then, later, Bossman #1 says to me how hard Kenin is working and I told him that I thought he was working way too hard, especially since he hadn't been released by his doctor to work more than 4 hours a day. Oops! LOL Kenin tried to recover from that one, but I'm glad Bossman #1 knows that he's working twice what his doctor wants him too, and I hope the weinie feels guilty as hell, too, 'cause I'm bitchy like that.

All in all, I'd have to say it was a productive day.

Another Day in Paradise

What's irritating Betsy the most today, you ask? Why, thank you for your concern. Sit back, relax (believe me, I'm stressed enough for all of us), and let me climb aboard the soapbox.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tuesday night the following email was sent to me from an administrator at my school (names have been omitted to protect the not-so-innocent):

I'm reading email and apparently there is some unsafe behavior going on in
some of our classes on some days. Because we are a Love and Logic school
this does not mean it isn't "so sad when you hurt another child" because there
are definite natural consequences that go with being unsafe in school. The
natural consequence of unsafe behavior is no participation with other
students for a while and a plan of action. We have ----- and I to help
facilitate a plan of action session with any child and he is happy to make sure
kids communicate this to their home - via a phone call. We are still
progressive here at ---. Parents are still our partners.

I sent home a kindergartner the other day, early. The child and I called
dad and said, "Oh, this is a bummer. School ends early since your child is
making it so other children are not safe." Dad came to pick him up.

Chaos is not Love and Logic. Kids recognizing that the expectation is the same - safety and respect is love and logic. If they chose to act differently, it's a
bummer because there is always natural consequences to face. Let ----- or
I help you. --- and -------- can help too! We are here to work with kids and, of course, we enjoy playing with them too.

Today, during PE, a 2nd grader put his hands around the neck of a classmate, in a choking action. This happened about 10 minutes after he had another classmate in (what looked to me to be) a headlock. While returning to class after PE, he punched a classmate for no reason. Less than an hour later, in another unprovoked attack, he hit another classmate. After losing 5 minutes of recess because of his earlier behavior, he continued to throw rocks after being warned not to and began swearing on the busy, packed playground. He was sent to the office for a 5 minute time out (his 2nd in 3 hours) where he almost tore a poster from the wall and then played with the miniblinds on the window. There was no call to mom or dad and no communication to them of his behavior other than a note that he "had a rough day".

Are you kidding me???

The reason this kid is still at school is because he has Down syndrome. He's very high functioning, but because he has Down's it's "okay" that he does all this and more. At least that's how the school district sees it.

Now, here's the other side of the coin: I have a 23 year old son with Down Syndrome. He's labled 'profoundly retarded' (yes, I know i said the "r" word) and is on about the level of a 36 month old child. When Patrick misbehaves, he knows there are consequences. He knows that if his behavior warrants it, he may get popped on the hand, he may have a favorite toy taken away, or he may get a spanking. The point is, my kid knows what behavior is acceptable and what is not, and he's WAY lower functioning than this other kid. This is not to say that Patrick is an angel all the time, because he isn't. But he damn sure knows that if he acts out, he will face the 'natural consequences'.

I'm so sick and tired of parents of special needs kids who make exceptions for their child's behavior because little Johnny 'doesn't know any better'. Give me a break! With few exceptions, yes, Johnny DOES know better, or is at least capable of knowing better if you choose to teach him. One of the most important things, if not THE most important thing, that a parent must teach ANY child is what is socially acceptable behavior. It's no more okay for Patrick to throw a temper tantrum than it is for my non-special needs kids to throw one. What is going to happen when that 2nd grader punches someone and the other kids punches him back because he or she is sick of getting hit? In my experience, many (if not the majority of ) special needs kids don't have the ability to navigate the gray area that the rest of us has. They don't understand that something is okay in this situation, but not in that situation. Things for them usually need to be either black or white, not somewhere in between.

I feel that the school (and this child's parents - but that's a whole other story) are doing less than the best for this child. And gawd knows I'm a less than perfect parent, but when that child is a teenager or an adult and is still going around doing this type of behavior, who will be to blame then?

Okay, I Admit It

Back in July, I posted about a person I worked with last year who was a bit petty. Well, I don't know what happened over the summer, but that person is GONE!!! I'm very happy to say that she who was once petty is now pretty cool. It's amazing the way we're getting along and I'm proud to say that she's now my friend. I don't know if it was her, or if it was me, but whatever or whoever it was, things are much better now. We've both said how much more we appreciate each other this year, compared to last year, and now, yes, here it is: I was wrong. There, I said it. Are you happy? I hope so, 'cause I can't imagine I'll ever say those words again. Just ask my husband...

A Letter to My Husband's Boss

(If you might be offended by a little cussing - and believe me, it's way toned down from what's really going through my mind - or by, uh, I don't know, maybe the truth, then I would stop reading now or your face might melt and slide down your facial bones. And yes, Daddy, I know I shouldn't be writing this. Perhaps when I'm not so upset I'll consider taking it down. But that won't be today. And probably not tomorrow, either.)

==================================

You suck. How dare you decide to take away Kenin's sales commission without telling him upfront! You have no clue how hard he works for you. He's brought in 100K on his accounts in the last month alone, and you want to tell him that he can't have commission on that? You, who want him to do sales calls (without commission, naturally) while he's on the first vacation that our family has had in five years, want him to do something for you that is not even his job and that you're not going to pay him for, even his lousy 1 damn per cent commission? And you want this done on our vacation?? Are you insane? I didn't know they even made drugs that were so good that it caused you to think that you could intrude on a family vacation, particularly one that isn't yours!

In July, the day that you told Kenin he was getting a raise, you said that your goal was to give him so much money that he couldn't afford to leave your shop because he does such a great job for you. Well let me tell you something, asshole... this is not the way to go about accomplishing that goal. You said that you were going to consider dropping his commission, but he never heard anything else about it until today. You claim to be a person who stands by his principals, but this is shit. When you interviewed Kenin, he told you he wanted to work for a company that 'says what they do and does what they say'. Oh, Company X is that kind of company, we're exactly what you're looking for, you said. Yeah, well, my ass it's that kind of company. You are so lucky that Kenin such a good damn person because if I were him, you'd be kissing good-bye all those meetings that he scheduled to get your ass in the door. They are HIS contacts, you SOB, not yours! I'd be damned if I did a single sales call for you, much less with you after this bullshit.

I guess maybe I should thank you though. Now I don't have to worry about Kenin staying up until midnight working on spreadsheets for you 3 or 4 nights a week or the 8 or 10 or 12 hours that he works every damn weekend because he feels that its for the good of Company X, even though it's really at the expense of his family life. This man would follow you to the ends of the earth and practically kill himself working for you if you only treated him the way a respectable businessman should. Look at all you've changed! And you did it all for the price of a single lousy commission check, for a stupid $1124 commission check. Your company shipped out over a half a damn million dollars worth of work last month. And you want to cheat Kenin out of his fair share of that? Out of that work that he brought in? That's just plain sad.

What a week it's been!

Yes, I know I haven't posted. And to be honest, I'm sure that bothers me way more than it bothers the 2 other people who read this blog. I swear I haven't fallen off the face of the earth. But I kind of want to.

The last two weeks have been, well, a bit rough. I won't go through what happened last week except to say that I was very tired, what with having an actual job again. That first week is a killer. It's not like I was sleeping in over the summer or anything, unless you count 7 am as 'sleeping in'. But my gawd, it was those damn kids at work! I'd forgotten how exhausting chasing around a group of developmentally disabled can be. Ugh. I'm a bit more acclimated to it now, but I'm really glad that week is over, not that this week has been much better.

So, this week, Monday night to be exact, I drag Ash, Hunter, and Patrick to David's Bridal to have her dress for Jena's wedding altered. The seamstress - do people still use that word? - shortened the straps, pinned the booby cup things in, and began looking at the waistline of the dress with a funny look. Just for the sake of argument, we'll call it a skeptical look. Now, a skeptical look coming from a seamstress as she looks at an already-paid-for-all-sales-are-final-and-don't-you-even-think-about-asking-for-a-refund dress just scares me. I walk over to them just in time to hear her tell Ashy that 'we can't fix that'. Surely I misunderstood her. Totally channelling a very irate black woman from New York City at that moment, I tried to be calm as she tells me that because of the way the fabric is cut (on the bias, as if that means anything at all to me), if they try to correct the fact that seam isn't straight or flat, it will only make it worse. I guess she saw the look on my face because at that point, she hurried off to find her boss. Bosslady comes and after an equally skeptical look at the dress, she informs me that that is, in fact, the case. You could say that it was at that point that I was about this close to being livid. After calmly explaining that we'd been told by the idiot (No, I didn't really use that word. But I wanted to.) sales person that their alterations department could 'fix anything, anything at all', it was suggested to me that I might want to speak with the manager, who might be able to arrange a little somethin' somethin' to correct the situation. Long story short (okay, not really short, but at least shortER), we ended up being able to ORDER A DIFFERENT DRESS. I know they're going to try to stick it to me with a rush alteration fee, but I'd be surprised if they manage to succeed. At any rate, with a little luck, we should have a new dress by September 1st, which leaves just over 2 weeks to have it altered.

Short and sweet: Tuesday night, we had to go pick up Hunter's violin (not an instrument I'm excited about, or ever expected him to want to play), so, once again, I drug Ash and Patrick along, too. It was a huge cattle call thing, and it sucked, to say the least. My salesperson was not only incompetent, but an idiot as well, and not only could he not fill out the rental application, I doubt he could find his own butt without considerable help. Wednesday night I attended orientation at Arapahoe Community College, without, thankfully, children in tow. It once again made for a long day, but was at least interesting and without incident. Well, the lights went out because of a storm, but after the week I've had, that doesn't count.

School Begins

So today we started back to school. We being Hunter and I, he as a 5th grader and me as a 2nd year Severe Special Needs Paraprofessional. I was a little worried that he wasn't going to like his teacher because he'd been telling me all summer how a friend of his had gotten in trouble by her for running in the hall last year. That was no biggie to me because I spent half my time last year telling kids to QUIT RUNNING! in the halls. But Hunter doesn't think like an adult and after he nearly went ballistic on his teacher last year, I had understandable cause for concern. It turned out that he does like her and according to him, "she's strict, but in a good way." Now if we can just keep that sentiment beyond the first week of school...

Most of 'my' kids showed up today, except for one that's out of town for the next month and a new kindie that doesn't begin school until Wednesday. The kids were good, which was surprising, as our schedule for them was screwy being that it was just the first day. We tried to have them in class as much as possible today so they could get used to their new surroundings, and I think that was a good idea. One incident of note... I was told by Harry Potter (who last year wanted to marry me) that now he wants to marry Alice in Wonderland. I suppose it's for the best being that A) I'm already married, B) he's 29 years my junior (it may work in some circles, but not mine), and C) I don't think he can support me in the manner I wish to become accustomed to on just an SSI check every month. Oh well, he's still a cool kid.