i THOUGHT i lived in America...

but, apparently not.  I made my weekly trek to Walmart today and somewhere after women's clothing and before dog food, I passed through the baby department.  I have quite an awesome little nephew so I took a peek at what they had to offer.  Life was good, and then, all of the sudden, it was not. 

Walmart had onesies with what I will assume were cute sayings on them that were WRITTEN IN SPANISH.  I'm not 100 per cent sure what those sayings were because I DONT SPEAK OR READ SPANISH.  And why should I?  The last time I looked, I didn't live in MEXICO.

Now before you go get your undies in a wad, understand this...  I am all about immigration.  My dad's family came here from Ireland and my mom's was from England.  Ninety-nine per cent of us came here from somewhere else.  I have no issue with immigrants.  I do, however, prefer you to be legal, regardless of which country you started out in.

But my real bitch about all this is that if you live in a country that is not your "original" one, for crying out loud, LEARN THE LANGUAGE.  If I go to Mexico, I expect that you will have stuff written in Spanish, not English.  But I am in America, and I expect stuff to be written in English.  My sister-in-law is from Uzbekistan.  She speaks Uzbek, Russian, Turkish, English and a bit of Farsi.  She is, to say the very least, PREPARED to speak another language should she decide to visit any number of countries.  If you don't speak English, you should follow her lead.

Too Feasible Not To Pass On

Got this in an email the other day:

Everyone concentrates on the problems we're having in this country lately -- illegal immigration, hurricane recovery, alligators attacking people in Florida.

But not me. I concentrate on solutions for the problems. It's a win-win situation.

+ Dig a moat the length of the Mexican border.

+ Send the dirt to New Orleans to raise the level of the levies.

+ Put the Florida alligators in the moat along the Mexican border.

Any other problems you would like for me to solve today?

Trash Cans, a NYC Cabbie, and Speaking English

Just a random thought... Have you ever noticed that once a trash can gets full, you can still put an amazing amount of trash in it before you actually have to empty it?

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In case you haven't seen it yet, you might want to check out New York Hack's blog. It was a featured Associated Press story a week or two ago (yes, I'm a bit slow to update) and has some pretty interesting takes on life as a NYC cabbie.

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Last weekend, Kenin and I were having our usual Saturday date at Wal-Mart (groceries, don't ya know?) and I swear we were the only people on three aisles that spoke English. Now, I know that America is the great melting pot, blah, blah, blah, but come on, folks! Learn to speak the freaking language already, will ya? Wouldn't you think that'd make your life easier if you could actually understand what people were saying to you? If I went to live in Germany, for instance, it'd be in my best interest to learn to speak German, wouldn't it? If I moved to Russia, or China, I'd need to learn a new alphabet and a new language. Don't tell me it can't be done, because I know it can. My oldest brother, Roy, speaks English and Spanish. My younger brother, Robert, speaks English and Russian and his wife, Guli, speaks four (Count 'em out loud now: Uzbek, Russian, Turkish, and English) different languages! And bless her heart, she even says y'all! Now, granted, I can barely speak English (although I'm well versed in Southern), but you don't see me immigrating to some other country now and needing an interpreter, now do you?

So anyway, Kenin and I decided that we want to have t-shirts printed up that have the word 'Pendejo' written in big, bold letters. Underneath it, in smaller letters, it will say 'I'm learning your language, so shouldn't you learn mine?' Anyone want to place an order?

PS - If you don't know what pendejo means, expand your horizons and look it up. Here's a hint - it's Spanish.