happy birthday, pet

Just a year ago I wrote about the differences between me and Ashlyn. It seemed strange to me at the time because she was just turning 16. Well today she's turning 17, and it feels okay.

In the last year, Ashlyn's grown up a lot. Now I'm not going to say that she's perfect because as any parent knows, it doesn't matter how great a kid is, they're still gonna suck from time to time. But overall, she's a good almost-adult. She's taken on a lot of responsibility for her brothers, (Patrick in particular) and has managed to get A's and B's in school while babysitting all day. She's not a typical teenager in that she is kind of a homebody, even though she gets to go and do most anytime she wants. And she's always home on time, even now that she has her DRIVERS LICENSE. She helps out when she knows I'm having a rough day and often amazes me by just being herself.

There are times when I see the child in her still, although they're increasingly fewer and farther between. More often now I see glimpses of the adult she is becoming and I'm not sure some days how I feel about that. I'm not having a problem letting her grow up; I think I've done a decent job of teaching her the things that are important, and if I haven't, well it's a little late to be starting now, isn't it?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I love ya, Pet. You have your life in front of you and I hope you know that we're all behind you. You rock.

Yes, I Know, I Suck

Yesterday it was about 70 degrees here, a beautiful, sunny, warm day. This morning I woke up and it was snowing, with about 4 inches already on the ground, and the high temperature is supposed to be 32. Since this drastic weather change messes up any plans I might have had outside of the house (I didn't really have any plans like that, but in case I had, they'd now be ruined) and I really don't want to spend my day cleaning the inside of the house, I decided to blog so that I wouldn't disappoint the sole person who's subscribed to it. (See, I don't even know who you are, and I'm blogging just for you! :) ) Like I said, I know, I suck for not posting more consistently.

I'm still into the ancestry thing, and am having a blast. I've actually been in touch with a real, live relative who I'm related to from about 10 generations ago. Of course, I wouldn't know her if I ran her over with my car, but it's kind of cool to discover just how big my little world is. It turns out that the Riley side of the family is actually from England and not Ireland, as I'd thought, so now I can't go around touting the 'I'm full-blooded Irish' bit anymore which sucks, but whatever. I've traced the Riley side back to about the 1400's in England, but some of the dates are incorrect on the info I have. For example, someones child is born before his/her mother was born. That would be kind of cool, don't you think, if it were true, but I'm fairly certain that kind of thing is physiologically impossible. Anyway, I've upgraded my membership on the website to being able to look at documents from all over the world so I plan on figuring all that stuff out and making sure that what I do have is correct.

Hunter turns 11 tomorrow and is disgustingly excited about getting older. I guess at the age of 11 that's okay, but I gotta tell ya that at the age of 38, I'd be pretty content if I quit having birthdays. Wait, I don't really have birthdays anymore; I have anniversaries of birthdays. So that means that in August, I'll have my 19th anniversary of my 20th birthday, which is, in my not so humble opinion, much better than having another birthday.

Songs That Speak to Me

Redneck Woman by hell-yes-I'm-a-redneck-and-damn-proud-of-it-thank-you-very-much, Gretchen Wilson. This is me. I can't help it.

Sammy Kershaw's Queen of My Double Wide Trailer. While I've never lived in a double wide, the first place of my own that I had when I moved out of my parents home when I was 17, was a single wide trailer. I don't think double wides had gotten popular yet, if they were even around way back then.

Sweet Home Alabama by the one and only Lynyrd Skynyrd. And I happily admit to carrying my redneck roots around with me - Sweet Home Alabama is the ringtone on my phone.

Blinded by the Light by Manfred Mann's Earth Band is one of those songs that I can listen to (with the volume ALL THE WAY UP, of course) over and over again and never get tired of. And yes, I know ALL the words, even to the extended version of the song. Watch me pat myself on the back as I ask you how many people you know that can say that.

Lone Star's first hit, Amazed. When we first began dating, this was the first song that Kenin ever said made him think of me.

Bitch by Meredith Brooks is the song that I think of when I think of my daughter, Ashlyn. She was only about 4 when it came out and she'd sing it loud and proud, but would leave out the title of it because it was a bad word. She still loves the song and still sings it without the title (at least when she's around me).

Uncle Kracker's Follow Me is one of the first songs my son, Hunter, really liked. He was about 3 years old and sang it to the best of his ability which, bless his little heart, wasn't very well. I think the next song he learned was Lose Yourself by Eminem.

Kid Rock's Cowboy reminds me of Patrick because it's the only song guaranteed to get a smile.

And one last one... Happy Birthday because, well, it's my birthday today.

Ah, to be 16 again!

Just a few differences between my daughter, Ashlyn, who turns 16 today, and myself, who was 16, some almost 22 years ago:

Ashlyn: Scared to death of driving and has no urge to even begin Drivers Ed or her state-mandated 50 hours of adult supervised driving; would much rather mooch rides from me, Kenin, her grandparents, friends, or her boyfriend. This girl will be right at home in the back of a limo should she ever be able to afford one.

Me: Although I was in the nut house on my 16th birthday, at the age of 14 (or was it 15?) I'd already 'borrowed' my parents car (and one belonging to a friend or two as well) and had driven with only my learners permit (and certainly no adult) all around the city of Augusta (GA) and the confines of Ft. Gordon. No, I never got caught by the cops, but feel the need to apologize to my brother, Tom, who got blamed for the time that I parked too close to the curb and ripped the air plug thing from the tire, resulting in the flattest tire ever seen in Kings Chapel Court.

Ashlyn: Has a FABALUSS relationship with her mother (AKA me), if I do say so myself. We talk about EVERYTHING, we bond (particularly over TV and food), and we hang out. She actually likes me, so I've decided to keep her. At least until she turns 18.

Me: Had a not-so-good relationship with my step-mom at the age of 16. Not-so-good is actually much better than my relationship with her prior to me being in the nut house. Don't get the idea that she was an evil stepmonster or anything, because she wasn't. I was just a butthead. The big turning point for me? When Ashlyn was born, my step-mom (now just known as MOM, 'cause she IS) accepted Ashy as her own grandchild. She's a great lady, and I love her bunches.

Ashlyn: Petite, skinny, and disgustingly shapely little stick of a child who eats, or grazes, all the time. I don't know who she got it from, 'cause I never looked like her when I was growing up, or even anytime after that. Ashy actually TRIES to gain weight if she goes below 105. How cool is that? Anorexia is NOT in her future. Her typical order from McDonalds (her favorite food place and where she works. Convenient, no?) is a Southwest Chicken Salad with extra dressing if you please, a Hot n' Spicy Chicken sandwich (or sammich, as we Southerners like to say) with extra lettuce and extra mayo, and a large strawberry shake. She complains her boobs are too small, but I keep telling her that at least they won't sag to her belly button when she gets older.

Me: An average sized child until about the age of 10 or so, I began to pack on the pounds after my mother died. I was a plump teenager (having the munchies during my druggie years prior to the nut house years didn't help much, either) and managed to become a plump adult. With the exception of a year before I got pregnant with Ashlyn and the year before I got pregnant with Hunter, I've always had a little extra skin hanging around. Since I can no longer have kids, I can't imagine I'll ever be slender again. Not that I'm complaining (much). I have to admit, Ashy definitely got her enjoyment of food from me.

Ashlyn: Works at McDonalds and actually LIKES it, and not just for the almost free food that she gets. She looked for a job for several months before she could find someone who would hire her, since she was only 15 at the time, and was thrilled to finally get hired. She worked her first Mickey D's birthday party last weekend, and her manager said that she wants her to do all the parties from now on. She's also training people, so she must be doing okay. I'm glad she likes it, but will most definitely have a fit if she were to become a manager. She also VOLUNTEERED to work this summer with me during the last week of ESY (Extended School Year, or summer school) with special needs kids. How many 15 year olds do you know that have been hired by the 2nd largest school district in Colorado to work with special needs kids? Do you not see how wonderful my daughter is?

Me: Although I was in the nut house at 16 (are you seeing the trend?), my first job was at the age of 15 and was at one of the Augusta-based chain of KFC-type restraunts called Wife Saver. They had good food, especially their shrimp, which you might not expect at a chicken place. But, alas, the shrimp and paychecks were not enough to keep me employed there for more than a couple of months. The lure of hanging out at the bowling alley (Of course, I didn't actually bowl. That would have been un-cool.) and smoking on the steps of the skating rink with my so-called friends was too much. I was too lazy to want to work, and would have most certainly killed any children that came in for a birthday party had they offered that as an option.

So, as you can see, Ashlyn is an incredible young lady. She is the light of my life and I'm so proud that she is so much like me, but so much not like me, too. I love her more than anything, and hope that all parents are lucky enough to enjoy their own children as much as I enjoy mine. Ashlyn, you rock.